Leave It Up to You

words & music by Doug Howell
© 2025 Creative Measures LLC

all I can see
is what I haven’t got
and all I can think of
are the things that I should not
and all that I can hope for
are things that just can’t be
oh, I’d surely go crazy
if I wasn’t sure you really loved me

so I’ll just
leave it up to you
I won’t worry anymore
I know you’d never let me down
you never have before
oh, Jesus, I resign
since you know best
be my guest
create a song of praise
out of this mess

all I can hear
just seems to make things worse
and even my favorite songs
are only empty verse
and all that I can cry about
are things I just can’t feel
all I know is that you’ve been in my shoes
and Jesus, you know what I need

so now I
leave it up to you
I won’t worry anymore
I know you’d never let me down
you never have before
so, Jesus, I resign
since you know best
be my guest
create a song of praise
please pour out your sweet grace
and make a song of praise
out of this mess

Notes

Yup, another surrender song. Another cry for help. I wonder what conclusions can be drawn from the fact that I have so many of them? I wonder if God ever tires of dealing with mess. Hope not, cause right now there’s a sure lot of mess in this world to deal with.

This song was written in the spring of 1975. “Jesus Never Fails” was written in September of that year, and has a very similar message. (Surprise.) Struggling not to want what I wanted, not to feel what I was feeling, to feel what I just couldn’t seem to make myself feel…

But what else are we supposed to bring to God? Only a perfect self? There’s only one problem with that: only God can make us perfect! No, we can only bring what we’ve got, what we’ve been given, what we’re feeling at the time. Only who we are, what he’s made us. That’s what he wants, that’s what he can work with. That’s who he loves.

I was raised on the verse: “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.” (Ps. 51:17, KJV) So I asked for help. I let my heart break before God—and somehow a song of praise came out of it.

Music Notes

Piano, vocal and strings on this one. I tried it first with just piano and vocal, but I just needed to add strings to get to what it meant to me, for some reason.

The photo was taken by a friend with a little handheld camera around the time I wrote the song, when I was part of Good News Circle. She sent it to me a few years ago, and it brought back so many memories. We traveled almost all the time then, and often sang in churches, as well as schools, colleges and other public venues. In the picture, I was doing what I often did, hole up in a church basement and play whatever piano I happened to find there. Play my heart out.

It was in a basement just like this I wrote the song, as I remember. I’ve never recorded it, because “Jesus Never Fails” was so similar in message and date, probably. But here it is, finally. Just in case there’s someone out there feeling like their world is falling down around them while no one seems to notice. I hope this song reminds you there’s Someone to turn to, and it’s not the end of the story. Not yet…